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Hostile Work Environment

(79 posts)
  • Started 1 month ago by Trisha
  • Latest reply from littlelulu
  1. Trisha

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    I work in a small department for a private corporation, I won't say doing what, and am being set up by a co worker to be fired. I see it coming. She has been doing my work when I am there, and whenever I take a day off (in which I have over 100 hours of PTO time left) she doesn't do my work. She'll even tell everyone in the company that she has way too much work to do and has to work late. Like some of the other posts I have read, she'll come in at 9:00-9;30 and leave at 4:00pm and only stays when the boss is there. Of course, making it look like she is overwhelmed with work. I took the day off yesterday and she emailed me at home saying that so and so have not been receiving documents that were urgently needed with this huge list. Dumb me, thinking that she had been handling these things and she had not been, stating that she only does my work when I am off and went on saying that I have left early on a number of occasions and had been taking a lot of days off. I have left early twice and have taken a total of five days off to date.All accounted for. I was under the impression that she was doing it all. She goes between the manager and the other two women, whispering and gossiping daily. It just so happens, she is the bosses favorite and of course the manager goes along with her because of this. Whenever I have a day off there seems to be some kind of complaint session between her and the others and as soon as I am back lo and behold there is a meeting. Where I am picking up all of the work they don't want to do.

    I just received citizenship last month, and prior to that I have put up with comments such as when I needed the day off to go for the interview with DHS, the manager says "are you being deported" One of the ladies came into my office and said I don't like Canada, oh yeah I forgot your from Canada. The manager had a bunch of dead worms on his carpet the other day and accused me of putting them there. Of course, that comment was parroted to me by one of the other lady's.

    The boss of the manager sits in his office with the door shut all day. The last meeting we all had together with him went something like, if I hear anyone complain they are fired. This was after she was running in and out of office. I found out that she was upset because the president or HR discovered what type of hours she was working and complained to him about it. I didn't lie for her when they wanted to see her and she wasn't there. I told them that they could catch her at the above hours I mentioned.

    This all started when we hired a male as a admin.This co worker would be his boss. The boss was out the admins first week, and she starting wearing short skirts and low blouses to work with him. We were sorting through boxes at his desk and she was bent down on the floor and needless to say you could see right down her shirt not to mention what else was hanging out. The admin didn't seem to mind. An attorney for the company also made some type of joke about her clothing. She said " OMG I just saw something I didn't want to see" "Whats up with that" I said "I know".. The others in the company were asking me about him and her and I said she liked him. Someone who was being malicious decided to tell her that I told them that her and the admin had something going on. It was an innocent remark on my behalf. She went from department to department asking people what I had said about her. I realize now I probably shouldn't have said anything. Then I find out the admin smokes dope, he surfs the net all day and makes offbeat jokes. So, I say something about it. In the meantime her and this admin are going out for lunch, shes driving his car, they get back to work and are joking in her office,daily. He came and went as he liked and her right by his side. He still not doing any work. I say something about it and am told that I am paranoid, insecure and not to worry about his job.

    Even though he has since been let go by her boss, she still has that hostile atmosphere going on. She encourages gossip, patronizes me, throws drama sessions and now acting as though she is doing a portion of my work to help me and really not doing it. She is dealing directly with the requestors so I have no idea they are not getting what they asked for.

    I went to HR and was told if this is about a manager. I don't want to hear it. Even though she does not have a managerial title she is allowed to act in that capacity.

    This past week after the last day I was off and back to work, we had a meeting over job rebalancing, I was given all admin duties while her and the other lady were given my workload. When I asked why? "I asked my Manager if there was something wrong with my skills he said "no". This just works better. I told him that it was admin work and he said that I was embarrasing the admin by saying that. She was even giving me some of her work. Everything is twisted to make it look like I am the guilty party or there is something wrong with me. As a matter of fact, anyone who was previously doing the job I was doing , all left because of her. She has had numerous others fired or put them in a position to quit.

    I am so stressed over this, I can't sleep, I'm not hungry. I want to quit. why should I? I have done nothing wrong. She is insistant on ruining my reputation as a good worker. Everyone in that department is covering the others butt.

    How do you deal with an environment like this? She is retaliating because I went to HR over her and the others are defending her out of fear of losing their jobs since we are having constant layoffs due to the economy.

    How do I handle this situation with some dignity? If I quit, I won't get unemployment.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  2. msliberated

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    Trisha Welcome to our forum!

    I'm sorry for what you are goig through:( but, YOU are not alone. Have you purchase Curt's book -Bad Boss Folio? That book helped me a lot. After I devoured it in 2 hours I felt so relieved from too much stress and fear of being terminated without cause and treated unfairly by my bulley boss and toxic co-worker.
    So far, just from reading your post I've found 3 things that will put you on a protected class and be a bulletproof employee!!!
    1)as a Canadian(race) 2)sexual harassment: male admin. gives you all the workloads and favors the other because they are dating.3)retalistion: harassment and mistreatment after reporting to HR-big NO NO on worklaws
    Now it's important that you do your move NOW!!!....DO NOT DELAY! Fight the bullies while you are still employed.
    Hang in there! There are others who will give their suggestions:super moderators,and proffessional ideas as well. Keep us posted

    Posted 1 month ago #
  3. Trisha

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    Hello and Thank You.
    Maybe I should have mentioned that the head boss in the department, who is behind closed doors most of the time, and threatens to fire anyone that goes to HR with complaints is an attorney.
    How do I start? I'm already stressing over what to do.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  4. msliberated

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    Trisha, I want to correct my wording on what is clearly going on between your co-worker and the new male admin.(in-charge)-SEXUAL FAVORITISM-----falls under sexual harasssment. Curt (undercover lawyer) or OnYourSide(our HR) can give you professional advice on the Boss whose always behind closed doors.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  5. littlelulu

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    Trisha, let me join MsLiberated in welcoming you to the forum. In addition to what MsLiberated mentioned above, how old are you? I am just curious to see if you are 40+ for another possible protected class of age discrimination.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  6. OnYourSide

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    Hi, Trisha - welcome.
    Don't quit! Make the you-know-whats fire you. Don't give in to the petty childishness that's going on. Be the adult and focus on your job, keep your head down, do your work and don't engage in the gossip and back-biting and back-stabbing. That's the best way you can be sure your job is secure.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  7. Trisha

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    Hello to all that have answered and thank you for your help.
    I am over forty and that does place me in the age category, however, everyone in this department is over forty.
    I feel as though I need to clarfy this, the male admin that was in our department was let go due to downsizing. It is the female assistant to the attorney who has been making it impossible for me on the job. She is close to the manager and close to the attorney. She gossips with the other two women, so of course they are caught up in it. She runs between the manager and the attorney causing conflict for me on the job. The manager has the mentality of a 12 year old and between the two of them their is a lot of drama. Those outside of out department call it the drama department. It is a small company and the owner was indited once and got off. I haven't done anything unethical however, there are always comments about mafia involvement and so on. This admin to the attorney does all of the confidential legal work and between her and the manager they give the personna that they are untouchable. Anyway, this nightmare all started from other people making comments about her relationship with the male admin that was let go whom she spent a lot of time with. Someone had asked me about it and I said she liked him. To me an innocent remark that got twisted. She came into my office closed the door sat across from my desk, pointed her finger at me and then yelled "you better stop spreading rumours about me? and it has like I said been a nightmare ever since. I went to the HR director in tears, told him what was going on and asked for suggestions on how to handle it. I asked him not to mention it to the attorney since we were warned about talking to anyone in HR and I didn't want to get fired. I didn't tell him the firing part. I just thought it. She goes from person to person whispers, makes comments and when I ask her about them she says I am paranoid. Which is something all of the others in the department parrot, everytime I question something. Such as this past week I had taken Tuesday off, since I have to use my PTO time or lose it. I came back and there of course was a meeting called by the manager, handing me all admin work and sharing my normal workload among the other two who perform the like duties with me. Even his admin was giving me her work, and when I asked the manager w"why" I stated if there is a problem with my competency at doing my job, we need to talk about that" He said there was none and felt that this would be a more balanced job load. The admin to the attorney rolled her eyes. Following that meeting the manager came into my office, so I asked him again if there was something wrong with my performance and he said no, so I asked him why the other ones would be doing my work and he said there are going to be layoffs coming up and everyone needs to be busy. She emailed me Friday, saying that people were not receiving there documents and even though she was doing them previously, she acted as though she was only working on them for me on my days off. She had been placing requests in my inbox after I left for the day or just before. She's been taking privately on the phone with the people I do work for so I don't know what is high priority. She makes it look as though I haven't been doing my job. She emailed me this long list and when I responded with Thank you for letting me know and I'll work on it Monday she emailed me back a nasty note.
    The attorney has threatened in meeting, not naming person's but saying things such as "If you talk to HR about this YOU WILL BE FiRED". "Stay away from HR" "no one has friends here" I have a feeling that the HR director talked to the attorney when I approached him the first time, since the attorney has that "don't go to HR" meeting after that first time.
    They are tight, the managers and this admin, HR and their staff are all on this private stock option plan that pays out and is suppose to be secret from the rest of us.
    I am literally sick, I am ethical, a hard worker and I don't deserve this. I am being placed in a position to quit and I know if I don't they are finding cause to fire me. I'm sure the other worker's list is justification enough for them. My work is micromanaged, everything I get in the email is what everyone else gets in their email, they are constantly walking by my office and looking in to see what I don't know, I caught the legal admin checking my computer when I was in the file room and heading back to my office. The last person I worked with was fired because she didn't like the idea of the other worker getting a raise for doing a good job. She stated that "it would cut into her raise"

    It's horrible, the comments, the backstabbing, the games. How do I start to handle this? I'm quiet, I stay in my office, I mind my business, do my job and try to remain pleasant.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  8. Trisha

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    Posted 1 month ago #
  9. Trisha

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    Sorry all, I am just very distraught over all of this.

    This is the email she sent Friday, on my day off. Following my response to her on her first email stating that I was sorry,thanking her for helping me out,I would take care of it first thing Monday morning, and I didn't know she wasn't doing my part of the job that since I was led to believe by her that she was.

    I've taken out names information due to my ethical nature.

    whether or not I have enough on my plate is irrelevant - if _____or whoever says resolutions need to be done right now and the deal has to close - then they have to be done - I did mine and Other Lady’s (to help her out) - I have to just assume you do yours. I am not going to quiz you about it. Like my note said below - I had only been doing yours if you were working on Project(most important project right now)or if you were not here and the deal could not wait. You have been out several days, some partial days others all day. Originally I thought I was doing the right thing - I've always referred this type of assistance as "team work", but you have complained several times (yes, it got back to me - again). As far as being confusing, if you are going by the board packages that I have given you to use as a source of information to prepare your subs, etc. and then go into the computer folders to prepare a consent/cert - it's either there or it's not - if it's not there you know you need to prepare one - if it's there, then you know it has been handled. Even more, you are copied on all the pdfs I send to Requestor if I have prepared the docs. If you read the e-mails, then you would already know what has been done. What is so confusing here? You seem to think everyone will think you are incompetent if someone helps you out. To this day I have never understood that. You are very competent, but you spend so much time worrying what everyone else is doing, you have trouble focusing on the task at hand - that's when things are compromised, errors are made, etc. I give you my word - going forward, I will not extend a helping hand towards your duties whatsoever, UNLESS I am instructed to do so by attorney himself.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  10. whonme

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    I personally, would like to respond to her with something like:
    "Dear Panties in a Bunch"...
    But realistically, I think, perhaps it would be better not to respond at all. (But that's just my opinion; I'm sure someone else here on the forum will have better suggestions.)
    I do however, know a lot of what you are going through in that things are done or are not done, you are NOT communicated to, things are left up to assumption and then you're treated like dirt for Not Knowing...
    They re-assign your work and then you're supposed to KNOW what things are still on your task list? That's ABSURD.

    Hang in there.

    Who - N - Me.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  11. littlelulu

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    Trisha, I am hoping that OnYourSide will have some expert HR advice for you. This woman is a real BI*CH and *needs* to be stopped.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  12. Trisha

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    Thanks littlelulu; I hope so too, considering that email is all bs and it is only to make her look good and me look bad. She's all about drama. This has been going on for a very long time and the other three play up to it. The manager will gossip with her to get the drama in the department going. I don't understand why the boss lets them pull this stuff off. He believes every word that comes out of her mouth. When his door is open she acts likes a sweet innocent girl, when he closes it which is 7 hours out of an 8 hour day she is a terror. When I attempted to speak up for myself with her she stated that everyone can't be wrong there must be something wrong with you. The two fo them have been written up several times by the others who have quit or were fired and nothing is done about it. As a matter of fact, one comment of hers to me was I have been written up before and I don't want to be again.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  13. Trisha

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    BTW.. complaint session today,, after taking Friday off. I knew that was coming.
    oh.. and according to them everyone that was fired has been labeled as crazy and those that have quit and complained are disgruntled employees. I love my job but hate what is going on in the department. Am I disgruntled, maybe.. after putting up with this who wouldn't be. I've seen what they have done to other people and it is not nice.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  14. littlelulu

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    Sounds like my ex-sup. She wouldn't say shit if she had a mouthful of it in front of other people but get her behind a closed door and she becomes RABID.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  15. Trisha

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    Littlelulu: This one likes to say all kinds of shit in front of others. It's all about the drama.

    I didn't mean that I had been written up before. She had been written up before and didn't want to be again. I have never been written up in any job I've had.
    I asked HR if I could have a copy of my personnel record, I was told by the girl that the HR director and the boss are too tight and he would run back and tell him that I wanted a copy. she said there was nothing in it, except my resume, not even my performance appraisals that were previously done. I'm wondering who has them?

    Posted 1 month ago #
  16. littlelulu

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    Ummmm - your performance evaluations/appraisals are SUPPOSED to be in your personnel file........At my previous office, not only was there a personnel file in the administrative area but ALSO a desk file in the supervisors office. Thats where the bitchy female sups kept all there nasty little comments and notes so they wouldn't forget to write them into our yearly evaluations. MY ex-sup spent a HUGE amount of time shredding documents in *someones* desk file after a co-worker asked her sup, with a union rep, to see HER desk file. Her sup put them off for several hours while she cleaned the nastiness out of the file. My ex-sup, in turn, cleaned out MY desk file ( I KNOW it was MY desk file). It was her way of covering her perky little ass.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  17. msliberated

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    Yup-EEOC rep/investigator said these files will miraculously disappear,....that's why it is very important to have your own copy-ALL THE TIME!

    Posted 1 month ago #
  18. OnYourSide

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    Geez - tell little Miss Panties in a Bunch to blow it out her a&% ... well, maybe not. I'd just ignore that twit and do my work.

    I would, however, request - in writing, from HR - copies of my COMPLETE personnel file INCLUDING ALL PERFORMANCE APPRAISALS. Who gives a crap if the HR guy tells little Miss Panties in a Bunch? Maybe she'll worry a little bit.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  19. msliberated

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    OnYourSide(grin) I think this is about the time I'll call eeoc for an update should i also ask for copies of all my files and by request thru e-mail? Please advice

    Posted 1 month ago #
  20. OnYourSide

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    I'd use email, so I have a record of it.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  21. msliberated

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    Thanks OYS:) Just FYI-I have noticed for the past teo weeks now that all of HRs are always in my (****)location. Should I conclude that it has to do with my on-going investigation? Monday, the BIG BOSS(dist.) miraculously glanced at me standing in the racetrack(lil'old me)and waved his godly hand and said hi?!?! WOW-what was that all about?! Inquiry mind wants to know. Once again, THANKS A MILLION for being here for us OnYourSide!

    Posted 1 month ago #
  22. littlelulu

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    GOD - I mean your boss - acknowledged you, waved and said hi?? WOW, he must be starting to *worry* that MAYBE you are not going to back down.......

    Posted 1 month ago #
  23. msliberated

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    OH Yea! lulu this man thinks he's sooooo BIG (district mgr.) that everytime(once a week)he walks in everything has to be clean and clutter-free within his Highness walkway.....that some Sundays evening(where I usually be) I sometime daydream of him slipping on something and falling on his ass!!!.....because it was so slippery clean(evil grin) He never....EVER.... says hello to us lowly ones nor acknowledge us. He only deals with his gang of A******( 0 )I felt soooooo honored that day(yuk)

    Posted 1 month ago #
  24. littlelulu

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    Actually, you should feel very smug that he acknowledged you because I think YOU are not intimidating HIM (EVIL LAUGH).

    Posted 1 month ago #
  25. Trisha

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    I really don't care if she finds out that I have requested a copy of my personnel file, it's the attorney (our boss) that I am concerned about. He and the HR director are always together, (tight). I'm going to reiterate in an email that there is nothing in my file except my resume and I-9 and see how that flies. It sound innocent. This lady in HR knows exactly what the three of them are like. I have kept every email ever sent to me. Either printed it off or forwarded it to myself. Our tax manager representing himself as an attorney and the drama queen acting in the capacity of a supervisor.I know that the drama queen is writing notes and keeping them in her office or giving them to the Manager to keep in his office. Now that I have all the crappy work on my desk, her and the other ones are swinging on their chairs all day. I know that I should probably take the time to look up cases and figure out how to handle this, it is difficult when I am actually the target and stressed over it. My blood pressure is consistently climbing. It was so bad one day, my head felt like it was hit by a bat and I went home. Thank God! I went to the doctor the next day and I was told I was on the verge of having a stroke. I was perfectly healthy until I started to work there. It's like working in a mental health hospital. I initially thought there was something wrong with me. I've come to the conclusion that some people are just CRAZY.and IT"S NOT ME.BTW.. Mr HR is always smiling and waving at me. Makes me nervous.

    Thank you for all of your support littlelulu and Msliberated. I know I am rambling, I just feel so beaten down and any input is helpful on how to begin to handle this.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  26. Trisha

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    Thank you too Onyourside. I've got a plan to get my hands on it. I'm pretty sure I have copies of performance appraisals here. All good. I'd quit, but I,m not. Because... I have done nothing wrong, except get an education and work hard, If I leave, who's reputation will they ruin next and I need the money. Their asses are scared that they will lose their jobs due to cutbacks, well, what goes around comes around.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  27. littlelulu

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    Trisha, definitely do not quit. Thats what they want you to do and you can't let them win. Not only would it leave you with no income but eventually it would eat you up inside that you gave in to them. Your self respect and self esteem would both suffer.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  28. Trisha

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    I feel a little better, I got that there is nothing in my file from HR in writing.
    I emailed the lady in HR and said "As per our conversation, are you sure that there is nothing in my file except my resume, I-9 and report I printed for my evaluation" She emailed back and said " That's it, I double checked for you" Shot that to my home email.
    Now next question is how do you put yourself in a protected class so that those around you, know?

    Littlelulu: I'm really having an internal battle with not quitting. Today for instance, I had all kinds of crap thrown on my desk, my manager screaming at me first thing this morning because he was stressed and wanted something now, stood over my shoulder until I did it. (literally). In another matter, he sent me an email asking me to take care of something else and then sent another saying, " I need you take care of this first so see if P will handle it and if not see if the drama queen will do it. So, I took it to P and she grunted and said I'm real busy if I get time I will take care of it? so I said that's ok, I'll see if drama queen will take care of it... OMG.. I went in there and said that the Manager needed it handled and P was too busy so could she handle it" the look I got...prescious.. squinty eyes, grumbling.. and said "Well what I am suppose to do with this?" so I gave her the email and said the directions are on this" walked out of her office. She griped and grunted, went and got signatures. put it all back on my desk with sticky notes all over it telling me what to do with it. Then has the nerve to shoot me an email saying that she created a folder on the computer drive for me to upload when I am finished. and basically says she did my job. Sheesh, I'm glad I have the managers email, I'm sticking those babies together. Shoot, this is very draining and makes it difficult to focus on anything.She left at 4pm after coming in at 9:30 and taking an hour and a half lunch. I ate at my desk and didn't get out of there until 6. Somethings wrong with this picture.

    Posted 1 month ago #
  29. msliberated

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    Trisha-document all this! Forward all the office e-mail to your personal email at home for records keeping. It might just come in handy.....someday

    Posted 1 month ago #
  30. Trisha

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    Msliberated: I have been for over a year, since I caught a glimpse of what she was doing with other people I have worked with. I take notes, times and dates, who was in the office at the time and send all email to my home address. I have kept everything directed toward me. She's very manipulative, and it made me weary from the start. Then again so is the Manager. While I was getting something signed in the attorney's office yesterday, he was making Jewish jokes with the Manager in there. I'm not Jewish, it was still offensive hearing it come from an attorney who is supposed to know better. Anyaway, I have to run, another day in paradise. Thank you all.

    Posted 1 month ago #

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