Do You Know the 4 Key Steps to Taking Back Your Life from a Bully?

Question: What are the four key steps to taking back your life from a bully?

Answer: Listen to our interview with psychotherapist Dr. Ben Leichtling (pronounced Like-Ling).  Dr. Leichtling wrote a book about how to take back your life from a bully, and consults with companies on how to eliminate bullying from the workplace.

Dr. Leichtling reveals in this interview his four key steps to breaking free of a bully.  He also give invaluable advice on how to deal with the mental and physical trauma that bullies inflict.  This is one episode no one should miss.

Podcast #11: Interview With Dr. Leichtling

Dr. Leichtling was so generous with his time that we couldn’t fit all of his helpful insights and ideas into the podcast, but it was simply too good “to leave on the cutting room floor”.

So even more of this interview is available on the Members-Only Forum, which is just $1 for the first month (and no further obligation).  You can join the Member Forum here: http://undercoverlawyer.com/amember/signup.php

The Quick Tip a site where you can rate your boss, and check to see if you potential new boss has been rated by his or her employees.  The site is: http://www.ebosswatch.com/

Find even more helpful info from Dr. Leichtling at his site: http://www.bulliesbegone.com/

Let us know your thoughts on the interview, and what physical and mental effects, if any, you have felt as a result of a bully in your workplace.

-Curt

P.S.  The link for getting access to the full interview with Dr. Leichtling (for just $1) is here: http://undercoverlawyer.com/amember/signup.php

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When Your Bully Boss is Behind Closed Doors, Do You Want to Know What the Lawyers Are Telling Him?

In Episode #9 the Undercover Lawyer (Curt K.) reveals 10 things that bosses do to their employees that cause hostile work environment lawsuits. (Podcast Player below). Even defense lawyers get mad at bad bosses, because bad bosses cause lawsuits.  This is explosive information that big business pays top dollar for; Curt himself regularly charges companies $1,000+ for “How Not to Get Sued” seminars that cover this same material!  But now you get it for free, plus Curt’s explanation of how employees can use this information for their advantage.

In the Quick Tip Curt covers how the new Federal Bailout Program includes money that you get right now if you’ve lost your job.  It’s the COBRA subsidy, which requires your employer to pay 65% of COBRA premiums, so that you pay only 35% of the premium to maintain health benefits after leaving a job.  Before this you would had to have paid 100%.  You can get more info here: http://www.dol.gov/ebsa/faqs/faq_consumer_cobra.HTML

JOIN THE RESISTANCE!

And the most exciting news, the Members Only Private Forum of the Undercover Lawyer Academy is now available for only $1 for the first month (and $14.97 per month thereafter).� This is a giant discount from the usual $47 per month that will go into effect in about 30 days.� But if you sign up now, you lock in the $14.97 price for life (even after the full Employment Law Academy opens with tons of powerful new content).

You can take advantage of limited time $1 offer by clicking here: http://undercoverlawyer.com/amember/signup.php

Gradual Workplace Harassment Is Not Legal Harassment

You complain to your manager or to H.R., and what do they tell you?  There’s no evidence that you are putting up with an illegal hostile work environment.  But you are having trouble sleeping, you feel sick when you think about work, and even though you try not to you spend most of your time worrying about work, you think about little else.

How can your boss or H.R. excuse this?  How can they possibly claim that nothing is going on?

Acme Markets said that Gloria Nieves was just complaining about good old fashioned teasing among co-workers.  Some of it may have been insensitive, but Acme claimed that no one thing that happened to Gloria at the deli where she worked amounted to illegal harassment.  But Gloria knew differently.  She took Acme to court, where the court said even when single incidents don’t amount to illegal harassment, courts consider everything that happened to Gloria “as a whole” before deciding whether or not the company’s treatment of her added up to illegal harassment.

Find out whether Gloria won or lost after the court ruled that Acme should have “viewed as a whole” all the harassment that Gloria was putting up with.

The Gradual Harassment of Gloria Nieves

Gloria is Hispanic and born in Colombia.  She began working part-time at Acme Deli in Middleton, Delaware in November of 2001.  When Acme opened a larger store in Middleton two years later Gloria applied for a full time “senior night associate” position in the new store.  Based on her seniority Gloria got the full time job working nights at the new location.

The hostility toward Gloria began as soon as she began working full time at the new store.  She was told that she wasn’t allowed to speak Spanish to Spanish speaking customers.  Her manager wondered out loud how Gloria could have possibly won the full time position because her “English isn’t good.”  Another time a co-worker questioned whether Gloria had a “green card”.  Gloria was called “stupid” when she asked questions and was treated like she had never been educated.  When the topic of drugs came up, a co-worker would say “ask Gloria because she’s from Columbia.”  When Gloria’s husband Emilio came to the store she had to listen to them say “de plane, de plane,” referencing a Hispanic character from the show television show “Fantasy Island.”

Gloria complained to management and to H.R. about all of this, of course.  Management’s response was to simply tell Gloria “Don’t worry.”  In the eyes of management none of this harassing conduct amounted to an illegal hostile work environment.  It was all just good fun and joking around.  Her complaints were not taken seriously at all.  For instance, once when Gloria made a complaint to a supervisor, the supervisor simply waited until Gloria turned her back to walk away, and then he started laughing at her — and encouraged Gloria’s co-workers to do the same.  Gloria was even called “Chihuahua” from the Taco Bell commercials.

Gloria began to cry frequently because of the workplace harassment.  The Acme Deli, however, blamed her crying on “marital problems.”  Gloria finally went from work to the emergency room due to chest pain, caused by the hostile workplace she had endured for so long.

Instead of taking responsibility for Gloria’s deteriorated physical condition, Acme Deli accused her faking her illness.  The next week the Deli Manager suspended Gloria.  Gloria filed harassment claims with the EEOC based on her national origin.

Acme Deli responded to Gloria’s EEOC complaint by arguing that none of the conduct Gloria complained of was “severe enough” to be considered unlawful.

The EEOC sent a letter to Acme stating that it’s investigation indicated that Acme had engaged in discriminatory practices and violated employment laws.  After the EEOC scheduled a conciliation (settlement) meeting, Gloria filed suit in court.

How Did Gloria’s Harassment Case Against Her Employer End?

In court Acme against argued that Gloria’s suit should be dismissed because the harassment Gloria suffered was not “severe or persuasive”.  But the court applied a test used by the Supreme Court, call the “totality of thecircumstances test”.  Under this test:

“workplace conduct is not measured in isolation; instead, whether an environment is sufficiently hostile or abusive must be judged by looking at all the circumstances, including the frequency of the discriminatory conduct; its severity; whether it is physically threatening or humiliating, …a mere offensive utterance [or] whether it unreasonably interferes with an employee’s work performance.” Clark County Sch. Dist. v. Breeden, 532 U.S. 268, 270-71 (2001).

Acme claimed that Gloria had only identified isolated incidents, while Gloria argued that a set of multiple incidents makes a pattern, and an illegal pattern at that.  The court reviewed all the incidents, and found that “while each act/comment, in isolation, might be perceived as insensitive, taken as a whole, a reasonable jury might conclude that the acts/comments were motivated by adiscriminatory purpose.” ( Nieves v. Acme Markets Inc., D. Del., March 7, 2008)

The Undercover Lawyer’s Take-Away Tips for Fighting Workplace Harassment:

The Abusive Boss Who Lost in Court

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Abusive bullying boss ruining your work? You need to hear about Joe.

Joe is a hospital perfusionist (the person who operates the heart-lung machine during an open heart surgery).  Well Joe’s boss, a surgeon, yelled at Joe, cussed at Joe, shook his fist and threatened Joe’s job. Joe got sick.  Literally sick.  As in having to go to his doctor and get anxiety medication, dreading every single work day morning type of sick.

Joe didn’t just turn the tables on his boss, Joe freakin’ flipped the tables over.  Here’s how:

The Bully-Boss Surgeon
Joe Doescher’s “boss” was a cardiovascular surgeon named Dr. Daniel Raess. Dr. Raess behavior included yelling, screaming, and swearing at Joe with “clenched fists, piercing eyes, beet-red face, [and] popping veins.” The final incident ended with Joe believing that Dr. Raess was going to hit him, but at the last second Dr. Raess screamed “You’re finished, you’re history” and he stomped out of the room.

The Anxiety Stricken Employee
Joe felt like Dr. Raess damaged Joe’s ability to do his job, his ability to interact with his wife and family, and caused him to suffer from anxiety. Joe was even diagnosed with a “major depressive disorder,” a “panic disorder,” and an inability to focus.

Joe Strikes Back
So Joe filed a lawsuit against Dr. Raess, alleging that Raess was a “workplace bully” who assaulted Joe and inflicted emotional distress. Joe’s lawsuit went all the way to the Indiana Supreme Court, who were keenly interested in the testimony of Joe’s expert witness, Dr. Gary Namie, the nation’s leading Bullying Expert.

The explosive result in this case made national headlines, but don’t settle for a sound bite explanation. See for yourself how Joe Struck Back, and how the result directly affects YOU.

Subscribe to the “Hostile Work Place Podcast” right now by clicking on the “iTunes” button below; OR scroll down to the media player and easily listen to Episode 8 through your computer’s speakers. No ipod required.

Raess v. Doescher, Indiana Supreme Court (April 8, 2008).

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I’m Being Harassed at Work! What Can I Do?

By Jenn S.

Illegal harassment in the workplace is no joke.

Workplace harassment involves unwelcome and offensive conduct that is based on race, color, national origin, sex (including pregnancy), religion, disability, or age (age 40 or older). Many states also have other protected classes so it is important to be familiar with your own state’s discrimination laws.

Some examples of harassment include offensive or derogatory jokes, racial or ethnic slurs, pressure for dates or sexual favors, unwelcome comments about a person’s religion or religious garments, or offensive cartoons or pictures, to name a few.

Keep in mind, however, that not all workplace harassment is illegal. Discrimination laws generally do not prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not particularly serious. For workplace harassment to be illegal, the conduct must either be severe (meaning very serious) or pervasive (meaning it occurred with frequency).

One instance of harassing conduct is generally not sufficient to meet the definition of illegal harassment, unless the conduct is very serious, such as a physical assault. If you believe you are being illegally harassed at work, there are several steps you should take right away to protect yourself:

1. Tell the Harasser to STOP:

Be direct – say what you feel. If you are not comfortable with the comments or conduct being directed toward you, be sure to let the actor know – right away. Make it clear that their comments or conduct are unacceptable and that you expect it stop immediately. One caveat: You are not required to confront the harasser. However, it is a great first step if you feel comfortable doing it. Your direct admonishment to the harasser may stop him or her in their tracks without having to resort to more serious measures.

2. Write it Down:

If you are being treated in a way that you don’t think is appropriate by any person at work, write it down. Dates, times, quotes – it is ALL important. The better the documentation, the better your case. Any notes are better than none – steno notebook, computer file, or cocktail napkin – it all works. Most important item – DATE. Don’t leave it out.

3. Tell a Member of Management:

If things don’t change after you’ve told the harasser that you’re not comfortable (OR if you simply do not want to confront your coworker), tell you boss or go straight to HR.

Take a look at your employee handbook and determine how it is that you bring a complaint of harassment. Follow any procedures that are outlined and if your company does not have any sort of procedure outlined, just talk with your supervisor.

Any inaction on their part will only add fuel to your fire, should you actually be forced to bring a sexual harassment complaint through a state agency.

Another caveat: If it happens to be your supervisor that is doing the harassing, go above their head to the next person in control, or any other supervisor-level person that you feel comfortable with, including HR.

Don’t just share with coworkers – You must go to HR or some supervisor to report the problem because an employer will not be held legally responsible for conduct that they did not know about. The only way an employer can know is if you tell them – and that is generally only through HR or management.

4. Demand Action:

Don’t let your employer sit on their laurels when it comes to your complaint – demand action and a result. Be sure to ask your employer for written evidence of their investigation into your complaint, as well as a written explanation of their results and findings.

It is your right to know what your employer is doing to address your concerns and if the employer’s action is ineffective in stopping the harassment, you probably have a case to take to a lawyer or your state agency that enforces discrimination laws.

5. Don’t Wait:

Do not wait to report the problem. As soon as you feel that you are being harassed, make your move, being it confronting the harasser or making a report to management.

Waiting could subject you to further acts of harassment that may worsen in severity or frequency – who wants that? Waiting may also result in keeping certain instances of harassment or discrimination from being considered should you wait too long to file a formal complaint through a state agency or attorney.

So don’t sit around thinking about it – if you feel you are being illegally harassed, stand up and fight NOW.

STEP 5 of Walking The Plank Toward Termination: Is Your Boss Hassling You About Tiny Aspects of Your Work?

If you feel like your boss has suddenly started hassling you about tiny, and seemingly irrelevant aspects of your job, then a red flag should go up in your mind.  This is another tell-tale sign that your boss is on the hunt for an employee to terminate — you.

Your boss may be trying to “build a record” of documented mistakes you have made, in order to justify terminating you. Your boss probably has not given you any negative feedback for years, if ever. And when the boss evaluates the major parts of your job — everything is fine. So, instead of noting your solid performance and moving on, your boss redoubles his or her efforts to find something, anything, that you are doing wrong.

This leads your boss into the tiny minutiae of your job — items that you can’t really say are unimportant, but are often get done not exactly “by the book.”  Your boss comes in, and makes a huge deal about something you are doing that is not EXACTLY “by the book.”

Everything works fine.  And your boss has never cared.  Until now.

But to your boss, this is an end-of-the-world problem you’ve caused.

Step back and realize, your boss’s reaction fits with how bad the boss wants to let you go; your boss’s reaction does not fit with how bad a mistake you actually made.

What Should You Do?

1. Ask your boss what is going on

Be polite about this. Don’t sneer and be sarcastic. Simply state that its obvious that something has changed, and ask what happened? Why the change?

You’re probably going to hear something like “Well I found one obvious error in your work, so I’m worried that there are other errors in your work that are not so obvious.” This is how your boss will justify tearing through your desk and computer in search of any mistake that could possibly justify terminating you. How to deal with this is the next tip…

2. Ask what your boss needs to see from you in order to win their trust back

The directness and honesty of saying this will knock your boss off-balance.  For just a moment, they will think to themselves “Maybe there is a better employee here than I realized…”  You must seize that moment.  Follow up with something like, “I want to show you that I still deserve the trust you once had in me.  What would you like to see from me in order to get that trust back?”

If your boss starts telling you what they want to see, then you’ve won.  That’s because a boss is not going to give an employee a list of goals, and then terminate the employee the next day.  So take careful note of that list that comes pouring out of your boss’s mouth — make sure they are measurable goals, and achieve them.  You will save your job.

BUT, if your boss does not respond with a list of things he or she wants to see from you, then you know your job situation is truly dire.  For example, your boss may say, “I don’t know, let me think on that one.”  Or, “I’m surprised to hear you say that… wish you had said that earlier…” (and then walks away).

So if your boss doesn’t give you a list of things to improve, and continues hassling you about the tiniest aspects of your work, then you know you are one step further down the plank toward termination.  It may be time to consider legal defenses, that do not rely on changing your boss’s mind about you.

Have you had a boss that micro manages your work, hassling you about the tinies aspects of your work?  Tell us about it in the comments section below.

Does Your Boss or Co-Worker Create Problems To Solve and Take Credit For the Solution?

Many of the people who contact me for help with a stressful workplace are dealing with a new supervisor who is causing chaos in the employee’s formerly peaceful workplace.  Why does a new supervisor feel the need to upset everything and everyone?

To look good.

That’s right, to look good by fixing a big mess.  And don’t think the supervisor will take responsibility for causing the big mess.  The employees who “can’t accept new ideas” will get the blame.

New supervisors are under a lot pressure to look good fast; they need to demonstrate that they deserved to be hired or promoted; they desperately want to show their own boss that he/she “made the right decision” in choosing who got the open management spot.

A Wall Street Journal article touches on this scenario (the WSJ piece describes everyone who creates problems to solve as an “employee,” and does not describe the ‘new supervisor’ phenomenon I so frequently see).

The article described a plant manager at a Louisiana-based chemical company who spread layoff rumors, then later informed his employees that HE had saved everyone from being laid off.

In another case, a woman claimed she had “fixed” broken working relationships between other members of her work group.  A consultant discovered that this woman actually caused the problems, by telling two of co-workers each that the other one could not be trusted.

New supervisors often fancy themselves as a “turn around specialist” whose mission is to fix a bunch of problems — real or imagined — and fix them fast.  One executive coach in the WSJ article spoke of turnaround specialists “confessing boredom when things turn quiet.”  His conclusion?  “If there’s no mess, those people can be very dangerous.”  The dynamic is the same for new supervisors who envision their new role to be a kind of junior “turnaround specialist.”

A final type of sabotage is displayed by the boss who knows that he or she should delegate work, but can’t stand to give anyone else control.  What happens is the boss will undermine their own workers, and then rush in to fix the “problem.”  In the boss’s mind, nothing can be accomplished without them, and the boss desperately wants everyone else to agree.

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Get Started Finding Solutions to New Supervisors, Desperate Bosses, and Co-Workers Who Create Problems To Solve, by signing up for my 7 part mini-course.  You’ll receive 7 work law secrets via email, all them straight from my authoritative eBook, “Work Laws Exposed.”  Sign up in the green box on this page.